What the Philosophers say about reality is often as deceptive as when you see a sign in a second-hand store that reads: Pressing Done Here. If you went in with your clothes to have them pressed you would be fooled; the sign is for sale.
— Søren Kierkegaard, “Diapsalmata” from Either/Or.
I just noticed this in the Gmail "sponsored link" feed:
Old Ladies And Young Men - www.DateACougar.com - Old Ladies Who Are Into Young Men. 100% Free. Join Now.
A fire broke out backstage in a theatre. The Clown came out to warn the public; they thought it was a joke and applauded. He repeated it; the acclaim was even greater. I think that's just how the world will come to an end: to general applause from wits who believe it's a joke.
— Søren Kierkegaard, “Diapsalmata” from Either/Or.
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5 comments:
Well--Old(er) men have been "into" young women since it all began, and nobody seems to be terribly horrified at *that* particular prospect. I think you are experiencing a gut reaction because you *are* a young man, and you do not find old(er) women attractive. Moreover, there is a perceived gender imbalance when woman are the hunters and men the prey, so to speak. Both behaviours work against long-established cultural constructions of the sexual dynamic. But this has not always been the prevailing paradigm: in the Middle Ages, for example, older ladies often married younger men.
(Not, I hasten to add, that I personally am either predatory or entranced by mere youths!)
And that, class, is the end of today's lecture.
--Prof. E.
I'm not saying that the age dynamic is strictly "wrong," only that I think it's a bit crazy for a "mature" woman to self-identify as a "cougar," and for young men to be interested in such a relationship.
I realize that this could be a sort of "recovery" of the word "cougar," but I doubt it.
As far as "old men/young women" goes: if there was a website that catered to that sort of thing, wouldn't you be a bit... frightened?
(Perhaps "cradlerobbers.com," or even "golddiggers.com...)
There is indeed such a website, geared to young very attractive women who want to marry old, very rich men. Can't remember the name of it, but it pops up from time to time.
Perhaps self-identifying as a "cougar" is a portal to empowerment that women who are not in the first blush of youth can use to mitigate the harm to self-esteem that this youth-obsessed society creates. But from what I gather, in my very superficial research on this subject, "cougars" are not "old" women--but women in their late 30s and 40's who are not usually part of the club scene. And who clearly want to capture their early youth by mixing with a younger crowd.
Hold on, you're not suggesting that all sexual interactions are predatory, are you?
Cougars are named after big predatory cats for a reason. They're scary when you meet them in the woods, and even scarier when you meet them in bars or nightclubs. There's a distinct line that gets crossed when a "mature" woman becomes a cougar; self-identifying would be one step further...
Well, at this point I have to concede to your superior knowledge of the cougar habitat and behaviour patterns. Can't say I have ever encountered anyone that I would consider to be predatory in the manner that you suggest. But what do I know? I live in an ivory tower....
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